Our Good Friend Loni

Let me just take a moment to apologize for my husband and say that Loni was laughing her ass off when we told her this one.

Austin & I are having a party at the end of the month. We sent out a general invite and our friend Loni, whose in a wheelchair, came back with a reply that she was celebrating her anniversary that weekend. So Austin is going to call her and ask her if she legitimately wants to come, i.e., we'll change the party date to accommodate her, while reminding her that we live 45 minutes from her home and our house was built in 1846 (not handicap accessible).

Me: I'd love it if she came, but 45 minutes here, a couple of hours hanging out. Then another 45 minutes home and stairs to both the front and back door. If her wheelchair can even fit through the door. Depends...

Austin: You suggest that one.

Me: We could get her to a restroom, but it'd be inconvenient. My sister's house is up the street. I think the school it locked up for the summer.

Austin: It'd be better if she stopped at Subway on the way in, then stopped at Subway on her way out.

Me: That's true.

Austin: But then there's the awkwardness of using the bathroom and not buying anything. They might give her a hard time about it.

Me: Nah, she's in a wheelchair. People are always supportive of people in wheelchairs.

Austin: You're right. She could just crap on our lawn. All the guests would applaud her and call her inspiring.