Blood

 Me: I don’t think the blood translates.

Austin: Technically, skeletons don’t bleed.

Naked Nutcracker

 Me: There’s a show called Hip Hop Nutcracker coming to CAPA.

Austin: I don’t think that’s a bad thing.

Me: I didn’t say that it was. 

Austin: I’ll bet the dancing is amazing.

Me: From the pictures, it looks pretty good.

Austin: I’ll bet over the centuries, there’s been several different incarnations of the Nutcracker.

Me: Probably. In the 70s, they probably had a Naked Nutcracker.

Austin: No. No man would be in a show called Naked Nutcracker.

Low Sodium Turkey

 Me: Sugar & Spice is out of low sodium turkey. The girl at the counter said she didn’t know if they would be able to get it back in. They were having trouble keeping it stock.

Austin, deflated.

Me: It’s always the stuff you like, bubby.

Austin: Next thing you know, I’m going to run out of wife. 

Me: Nah, I’ll probably just die.

Austin: I don’t know how I’m going to find another turkey. Everything else is so salty.

Me: I’m pretty salty.

Neighbors

 Me: Another of our neighbors put their house up for sale.

Austin: I wouldn’t think they could smell me from all the way up there.

Six Pack

 Austin & I have been to the Y a couple of times. He’s even made plans of making our dinners more healthy.

Me: Hey, you sexy, gorgeous man.

Austin: Just wait until I have a six pack…

Me, snickering.

Austin: of beer in my hand.