Do You See What I See?

 Austin, admiring the ankle socks at MeUndies: But if I got ankle socks that match my underwear, I’d feel obligated to wear the matching socks when I wear the underwear.

Me: That’s how I feel about my dinosaur footies.

Austin: Our whole underwear routine is already overly complicated.

Me: We have too much underwear and the underwear that doesn’t match doesn’t get worn enough. And really, underwear should be thrown out after a year of wear. Bacteria builds up in that area, makes it unsanitary.

Austin: That’s not true. I’ve had all kinds of underwear that’s lasted longer than a year and there’s no microbes or weird bacteria growing. Everything down there is normal.

Me, not saying anything.

Austin: Wow, the look on your face! That’s a ‘I spend time down there’ kind of face. (Singing the much loved Christmas carol) Do you see what I see?

Facebook Ads

 Me on FB: Oh my God, I can’t believe FB has an ad for this. I get jailed for jokes because FB is stupid, but it’s posting vibrators in their ad section.

Austin takes my iPad.

The Amazon pic.

Me: That is completely not even close to what I thought that was.

Age Gap

 Austin and I have been married long enough that we no longer feel the 10 year age gap between us, but every once in a while something like this happens.

Austin: I don’t know who that top group is.

Super bowl

 Austin and I were about to flip the radio station when the DJ said: Astrologists are predicting the Kansas City Chiefs win tonight.

Austin made some grumbly, growling noises. He thinks astrology is mumbo jumbo. And made some remarks.

Me: Astrology, real astrology, is complicated and when you know all the layers, there’s actually something to it.

Austin: Mumbo-jumbo, ya da ya da, garbage.

Me: We’ll just see tonight when Kansas City wins.