Going to the Meat Market

For the most part, I'm living my life normally, making dinner, cleaning house... But little things like going to the grocery store, thinking I could get COVID-19, makes me a little more unsettled.

Me, hugging Austin extra tight before going to the meat market with Mom: I love you so much.
Austin: You’re just going to Lanning’s, right?
Me: Yes. But every minute could be our last.
Austin: Oh. Okay, don’t kill me please.

Quarantine Day ???

This quarantine stuff is hard. I've been to the grocery store three times and went to a cemetery with my mother.

Austin is working from home and has gone to help his friends twice.

Otherwise, we've both been home. With each other.

Austin: I’m going to go upstairs and put myself on away then go for a walk, if you want to come.
Me: That’s the only reason I put on pants.

Cinco de Mayo

Austin: If we're still in quarantine for Cinco de Mayo, I think we should invent Social Distancing Pinata. It'll be just like regular pinata, but instead of hitting it with a stick, we throw rocks at it from six feet away. And after the candy comes out, we disinfect it and have to wait three days to eat it, just in case.

Broken Washer

Our washing machine is broken. I’ve ordered the replacement part, but it hasn’t arrived yet. Out of desperation, I reset the machine and put in a load. I was hoping I’d get through a few, but the motor is really grinding, so will be calling it quits after this load.
Me, through text: I don’t think I’ll be able to get more than one, maybe two loads done, Bubby. The load that’s in right now is entirely underwear, so at least we’ll have that.
In response, Austin sent me this GIF.
Me: I’m so in love with you right now, I’m at a loss for words.

I don't own the rights to this video. Stole it from YouTube.

Dying Extravaganza

Austin found a whole lot of dye on clearance for $0.76 yesterday. He bought all of it.
Austin, walking toward the checkout, then pausing, walking again, pausing again: I’m just not sure if I should buy all this.
Me: Usually I would have a problem with you bringing in that much junk, but you’ll use it. You love dying stuff. You’re constantly killing my soul.
Austin stops, stunned.
Me: A pun on dying and killing. Who are you today?

Chocolaraptor

Austin & I haven't been going as crazy as some Americans with the stocking up thing, but we are trying to cut our grocery shopping to once every two weeks. 

 

You stock up on what you want, I'll stock up on what I want...

Me, observing our bags: We should have gotten chocolate today.
Austin: I did buy chocolate today. I got Andes Mints.
Me: I want chocolate that I like.
Austin: Well, like what?
Me: I don’t know. But we’re out of good chocolate. I mean, I could order chocolate, I guess.
Austin: That’s a lot of chocolate.
Me: Not of the kind I like. It’s like six bars. And chocolate is viable for like nine months.
Austin: Not in this house. You’re like a velociraptor with chocolate.
Me: A chocoloraptor.

Running Out of Blog Material

Me: I’m running out of witty banter to put on my blog. You’re not as funny as you used to be.
Austin: Reality has set in. It’s a dark place where I live.