Breast Cancer Awareness

 It’s that time of the year again. *Sigh* My mammogram showed that my breasts were newly asymmetrical. This is often caused by changes in estrogen levels, but occasionally, cancerous cysts are the cause. Since I had a hysterectomy a couple of years ago, I figured it was hormonal, but in the spirit of safety, I was signed up for a more extensive diagnostic mammogram and an ultrasound.

Me, to Austin: It’s probably nothing, so don’t mention breast cancer to anyone.

Austin’s boss, the following day: Are you okay?

Austin: Yeah, I’m fine.

Austin’s boss: Okee-dokey.

Austin: In the interest of complete transparency, my wife may have breast cancer. She’s at the hospital right now having tests.

BTW, I am fine. I DO NOT HAVE CANCER.

Halloween

Cassie got lots of good loving from enthusiastic trick-or-treaters. Once inside and the festivities were over, she whined to go out again.
Me: No, Cassie. You’ve had enough.
Austin: If you eat anymore trick-or-treaters, the neighbors will get suspicious.

Trick-Or-Treat

Me: The neighbor thinks trick-or-treat is on Thursday.
Austin: That’s what I said.
Me: Yeah, but Mr. X actually talks to people and interacts with the community.
Austin: I talk to people. [Raising his fist and shaking it] ‘Get off my lawn.'

In the Spirit of Halloween

 Austin: What are we doing for dinner?

Me: Some kind of chicken.

Austin, urging me with his eyes to elaborate.

Me: I don't know. On the stove. In the oven.

Austin: Which?

Me: Frankenstein.

Sorry

 Unfortunately, COVID is having a toll on us. We simply have very little new or exciting in our lives.

This blog is going to become more sporadic.

If you'd like, I do post fiction on WattPad, user ID RLand 9701.

It's not humor. I mostly write sci-fi & fantasy. I've just started posting, so not much there.

Love you!

MeUndies

 Austin, still going on about Christmas: X friend loves this website, MeUndies.

Me: You and your obsession with underwear.

Austin: We could have matching underwear, you and me. Me in boxers, you with bra and panties.

Me: No.

Austin: You wouldn't like that?

Me: No.

Austin: They have a lot of different patterns. We could all have dinosaurs. Imagine, Christmas day, knowing everyone will have on dinosaur underwear.

Me, rolling my eyes.

Austin: I think we can customize underwear even. You wouldn't want Untamed underwear?

Me: No.

Austin: Just imagine, Lan WangJi saying "Hi," on your @$$.

Untamed Christmas

I have purchased all of Austin's Christmas gifts. 

Knowing that my Untamed obsession is still going strong (I just finished reading Scumbag Villain), Austin was looking for merchandise related to the show to get me for Christmas.

 

Me: I'm not really into stuff.

Austin: I know, but I thought you might like this pillow.

Me, red-faced: No.

Austin: You wouldn't want that between your legs.

Me: No.

Austin: I could sneak it into your room, then you'd just discover these guys on your bed.

Me: No.

Austin: Or I can wrap it up for Christmas, have you open it in front of your mother.

In case you're interested, here's a link to the pillow:

Lan WangJi & Wei WuXian Pillow