Earlier, I was joking about wooing the transvestite at work.
Austin, presently: I don’t want any other man taking you away from me.
Me: Like X?
Austin: Yeah. I understand now why men mark their women.
Me, a look.
Austin: I wouldn’t do anything terrible.
Me: Like pee on me?
Austin: Oooo, definitely not. I’m not marking you like an animal. I meant like tattooing my name on your forehead or—
Me: Or taking an iron to my face?
Austin: Right. I wouldn’t do anything stupid.
Me: Because marrying me was stupid enough, right?
Austin, presently: I don’t want any other man taking you away from me.
Me: Like X?
Austin: Yeah. I understand now why men mark their women.
Me, a look.
Austin: I wouldn’t do anything terrible.
Me: Like pee on me?
Austin: Oooo, definitely not. I’m not marking you like an animal. I meant like tattooing my name on your forehead or—
Me: Or taking an iron to my face?
Austin: Right. I wouldn’t do anything stupid.
Me: Because marrying me was stupid enough, right?
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