Sunday, March 26, 2017

Turkey Spread

Every year, for my mother-in-law's birthday, we stop past Anderson's and pick up a 2lb package of turkey spread. The woman at the deli told me how good it was, then the woman at the checkout. I told Austin when I got home.
Austin: They're right. It's really good. But I don't think you'd like it . . . because of
I start nodding, in unison: The mayonnaise.
Austin: But you really should try it.
Me: I'm not taking any of your mom's birthday present. Besides, mayonnaise is disgusting.
Austin: True, you shouldn't have to have disgusting stuff.
Me: Look, I have sex with you, so I can handle disgusting, I just don't like mayonnaise.
Austin: Oh-ho! Good thing you figured out how to use the vibrator yesterday, 'cause you're not getting anything out of me. Like ever again.

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